Frog
... of the stereotypes about males. We are obsessed with sex. We like beer, we love to go out drinking and get drunk with our buddies. We are jealous, so don’t even look at our girls or we’ll knock out your lights. Did I mention that we are belligerent? We are extremely competitive. We love violence. We like sports, especially violent ones. We like to play with swords or guns. We like cars, and we like to fix things. We are obsessed with sex. We are liars and cheaters who are incapable of being faithful. We forget all of the important things. We are sexist pigs. And so on. Well, let me first say that these are all true. I admit it. Everything I just said applies to me to some extent. I think about sex almost constantly, I like to go out drinking with my buddies, I am jealous, I m belligerent, I am competitive, I love violence, I like sports, I like to play with swords and guns, I like to fix things, I like cars, etc. I have also, in the past, lied, cheated, stole, been unfaithful, forgotten important things, and acted like a sexist pig. On the other hand, this description is only the barest part of being male. While I do feel that any man who ignores or denies these aspects of manhood is being untrue to himself, I also feel that anyone who claims that this is all there is to manhood is selling us short in a big way. We are, after all, human. We feel the same things as any other human does. We are loving, caring, and protective. We are chivalrous, we are friendly, and we are lonely just like everyone else. We also are products of our environment, and we add our experiences to our personalities as we go. The male dilemma is to keep a balance between what makes us men and what makes us human. We must juggle our hunter instincts and our civilized society, our enormous sex drive and our concern for our fellow human being. This is not always easy. Some men ignore it entirely, choosing to conform to the shape of the mold they were born into. Others deny their male instincts, thinking badly of the beer drinking football fan. Many, however, find ways to reconcile these aspects to some degree, and some find perfect harmony, embracing their manhood and their humanity. I have no idea what motivates women. I suppose that men are more commonly the ones referred to as uncivilized because motherhood and womanhood mesh more comfortably with civilization. I suppose that there is some conflict between being ‘girly’ and becoming a member of the human race. Fear of rats and bugs? A desire to shop all day, every day? Obsession with hair? As a man, I can hardly say what being a woman is really all about, yet I can imagine that women have much the same conflict as men do. Then of course, there are the people who break the stereotypes. The man obsessed with his hair. The woman who wants nothing more in life than to hang out on the couch every Sunday and watch football with her buds and her Budweiser. The man who loves to go shopping. Why do these people exist? Because stereotypes often don’t apply to everyone they seek to stereotype. Humanity just isn’t that easy to group. One thing I do notice is that there is a greater tendency to inclusively break stereotypes, in other words, for a male to participate in typically female activities. There are, in my experience, far more men who get in touch with their feminine sides than who wouldn’t see a good action movie. Far more men who are obsessed with their hair than who can’t appreciate an 83 yard return off the kickoff. Of course, I’ll be proven wrong when all of my male friends ask, “what’s an 83 yard return...