Book critique: Multicultural Issues in child care by Janet Gonzalez-MenaBook critique: Multicultural Issues in child care by Janet Gonzalez-Mena
... the way he or she listens and responds. Defensiveness can get in the way of so self- reflection is another useful strategy to uncover and explore one’s own feelings. Most people get defensive when they feel insecure or when an issue inadvertently touches personal history and old wounds. Recognizing defensiveness helps individuals take responsibility for their own feelings and learn to deal with them. Grasping the situation from more than one point of view is the goal of communication. Differences can’t be negotiated until that kind of understanding is reached. It’s the professional’s job to make sure the discussion keeps going even in the face of possible discomfort. Trying to negotiate solutions when either party lacks understanding is premature. Eventually a resolution may arise naturally from discussion or else from a negotiation process. Solutions to problems around differences fall into three common categories, all of which involve change. Those categories are: Resolution through parent education. This outcome involves the parent changing. This is the traditional parent education approach. I use myself as an example. I started as a parent in a cooperative nursery school. As a young parent with one child under 5 I used spanking as my main approach to discipline. In the nursery school I learned a number of alternative approaches to discipline and came to realize that spanking was working against my goals for my child to grow up and be a nonviolent adult. I stopped spanking. Nobody made me stop; I decided on my own. Resolution through caregiver education. In this outcome the caregiver comes to understand the family’s perspective and as a result makes a change in her own behavior or even makes a change in program policy. An example happened in a program where I used to work. A baby screamed hysterically whenever he was put into a crib no matter how tired he was. He never could settle down in the nap room but could easily fall asleep in the playroom in the midst of all the activity. Through conversations with the family, the caregiver discovered the child had never slept alone and they had no desire for him to learn to. Letting him sleep in a protected corner in the playroom was a solution, but it went against regulations. The caregiver argued with the licensing worker instead of with the parents and the program was granted a waiver. Resolution through compromise. This outcome, both parties have to give up something in order to resolve the issue. Here’s a hypothetical situation that occurs in toddler programs all the time. A parent hates to see her toddler’s clothes dirty while the caregiver believes firmly in the value of messy exploration and sensory activities. Finger painting is the caregiver’s favorite activity and children who resist putting on aprons are allowed to paint anyway. Through discussion the caregiver comes to understand why being clean is so important to this parent. The family equates clean with decent, so it’s a matter of pride. Also how they send their child to “school” shows their respect for education. The caregiver will make very sure the child is covered up during messy play; the parents agree to dress the child in slightly less dressy outfits. The parents still regard messy experiences as unnecessary, while the caregiver continues to think that the family is overly concerned with appearances. A fourth category of problem solving outcomes is different from the first three in that it is more complex and harder to understand. This category is called Resolution through embracing contraries. Here is the last example to illustrate contraries: Clean is opposite of messy or dirty. Another example of opposites common to early childhood educators is appropriate versus inappropriate. Putting concepts in opposition like that results from a dualistic mindset and makes us see differences as contradictions. How do we get out of that mindset? Rumi, a poet f...